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Jenn Mann answers your sexiest questions — unjudged and unfiltered. Recently while we were having sex, my girlfriend asked me to fist her. We've used strap-ons, dildos, and of course, our hands — but never fisted, specifically. She is one of my first girlfriends, and I've never actually experienced this before I haven't done it, and I haven't had it done to me. I know that we're not talking about a literal fist-in-vagina situation here, but still, I'm nervous because I don't know what to do. What should I keep in mind?


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I remember the first time someone got their whole hand inside of me. It was on my third date with a man who provided me with some of my darkest yet most intense moments of life.

A beginner’s guide to vaginal fisting

A charming sociopath who missed our first date because he was in county jail, and gave me a Japanese spyder knife as a courtship present on our second date. It comes as no surprise that this man was the first to succeed in fisting me when other lovers had tried and failed. He split me open and got under my skin in every way possible.

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But that first time he got his whole hand inside of me, it was better than drugs. The concept of fisting is pretty simple even if achieving the feat is somewhat complicated.

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The sheer intensity of stretching yourself wide open to let another person deep inside your body is generally more than enough stimulation. People cringe in horror when I talk about fisting. Fisting is culturally taboo as well — illegal to show fisting in porn, despite the fact that as Jenna Jameson astutely pointed out, her entire hand is probably smaller than the average porn star penis.

Being fisted is like yoga for your vagina or ass; it makes your pelvic floor muscles more elastic and flexible, but things pretty much always snap right back into place after an hour or two.

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There is the vaguely terrifying leap of faith when the fister curls their fingers and goes all the way in. There is that brief moment where the hand will feel impossibly big, like it will rip you in half, and you will want them to stop.

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You have to drop the fear and trust it, breathe through it. You will want to just sit with it, be with it, figure out this feeling so unlike anything else. You will feel impossibly close to your partner and vulnerable and raw. Just the intimacy and trust of being that full, riding on the sensations so different from anything else, is incredible. It can feel like being high, post-verbal and disassociative.

What is fisting, really?

Afterwards you feel tired, and relaxed, and totally satiated. You want cuddles and ice cream and to fall asleep. Fisting is admittedly not a sex act many people will engage in during their lifetime — either due to lack of interest, or being physically incapable.

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Others will reject it, then try it and love it. An hour later, with help from a Hitachi and a woman with a small hand, it happened.

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Every time I saw her after that, she would glowingly tell me how being fisted had changed her life, and how she needed it, wanted it all the time. You may unsubscribe at any time. More From Thought Catalog.

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If your idea of fisting is having someone shove their clutched fist up your vagina , then you've got it all wrong.


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